This week on Parents Are Hard To Raise… Six red flags, you’re getting bad medical advice. Current Elder Scams you need to alert your parents to… Plus this week’s survival tip will have you faking it till you make it.

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Resources and links for episode 17

Six Red Flags You’re Getting Bad Advice

  1.  The person giving the advice is not qualified.  Everyone has an opinion, but that does not mean they are qualified to give expert advice on the subject they are commenting on.
  1. The advice is not tailored specifically to you. People tend to give advice based on their own personal experiences, not yours.  Your needs, circumstances and experiences might be quite different that those of there person giving the advice.
  2. The person talks, but does not listen.  So, if the advice is punctuated with, “you should do this and you should do that,” be cautious. Good advice—medical or otherwise—requires that person advising you asks relevant questions and listens to your answers and concerns before advising you.
  3.  The advice is focused on the end result and not the process. Evaluating the pros and cons of any action is just as important as taking action required to solve a problem.  Looking at things from every angle and thinking things through help you to avoid making mistakes and recognizing when things might not be going as planned.
  4. The advice is emotionally charged.  When you seek advice, it’s because you want objectivity— a thoughtful second opinion.
  5. The advice makes the little hairs on the back of your neck stick up.  If your intuition tells you that there is something wrong, there probably is.  Just don’t listen.

 Resources on Dementia

Project Lifesaver provides timely response to save lives and reduce potential injury for adults and children who wander due to Alzheimer’s, autism, and other related conditions or disorders.

  • Here’s a link to Responsive Stuffed Cat toy I talked about on a previous show.  I’ve seen it help Alzheimers patients calm and occupied.
  • Accidental scalding and burns are a problem with people suffering from dementia.  Here are a few ways to prevent that from happening:
  • Remove knobs from stove or use Knob Stopper  or stove knob covers  to help prevent accidents.
  • Alzheimer’s sufferers tend to avoid walking on dull black surfaces.  You can use to help prevent wandering.  Place non-skid black colored mats at doorways or paint outside deck, porch or stoop with flat black paint.  If you hate painting like I do, Anti-skid stair treads can be a great alternative.  Use them to cover up a small area outside doorway or stairs where you don’t want the person to wander.
  • You can also use specialized locks on cabinets doors and windows to keep them secure.  The Door Guardian Door Reinforcement Lock is great for standard entry doors.  for sliding patio doors, I personally love Cardinal Gates Patio Door lock   I use them in my own home to prevent break-ins.
  • Use fall management slippers instead of shoes— some people with dementia will wander when wearing shoes but not in slippers.
  • It can also be helpful to label doors with specialized stop signs  that can be stretched across open doors at eye-level.
  • To prevent accidental scalding, set hot water heater no higher than 120 degrees Fahrenheit  (49 C)
  • It’s also helpful to use this neat little gadget on your faucets that use LED lights that change colors with water temperature.
  • Here’s the Shower Seat I recommend to my clients.  It’s comfortable, stable, easy to keep clean and a great help to the caregiver when bathing a person with dementia.   And since people with dementia can be frightened by water hitting them in the face, I also recommend a handheld showerhead.